Unrequited Perfection?

Remember the old commercial on TV where they ask how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop?

In that vein of thought I ask how many chances does it take to find perfection?

I know some of you are saying there is no such thing as perfection but perhaps you are using the literal definition. Many people don’t!

That’s a perfect example of how people are misunderstood in life. Because people often assume they know what someone is stating, when in fact, they might be very far off target! Although that is not the point of this writing, it’s related.

Throughout life we all have expectations and desires. In relationships, jobs and life in general. We also have a measured level of tolerance for our expectations and desires to be met. But, perhaps, sometimes we can be our own worst enemy when we have a low level of tolerance. In other words, we can expect too much!

I myself have had several relationships in my life. If I were a straight man I’d probably be one of those guys that has had 5 or 6 wives. Fortunately I’m a gay man in his 50’s so marriage wasn’t an option during my ‘dating years’. It still isn’t an option for gays in the majority of the USA, but I’m getting off topic.

Before you start to think I’m a total jerk I must say that two of my loves passed on and two of them cheated even though we had agreed on a monogamous relationship. In other words, I don’t feel my expectations or definition of perfection is the issue.

In regards to work, I’m a ‘jack of all trades’ kind of guy. I was once told I was like a sponge, that I wanted to soak up all the knowledge I could. The person telling me this was an ex-boss. She added that it was not beneficial for me to do so, that I would be better off sticking with one trade and planning for my ‘golden years’. I listened to her words but didn’t change my ways.

Again, don’t get me wrong. I wouldn’t trade my experiences in life. I truly feel blessed to have had a worldly existence. I’m a risk taker and live on the edge. Sure, there is a price to pay for that but there are also great rewards.

I’m not trying to glorify risk taking or living on the edge. A stable life is generally much less stressful. However, personally, I find it rather boring. I’m starting to wonder if, instead of alleviating the stress, I simply delayed it!

I tried to take ‘the easy street’ in life. If something felt wrong I followed my instincts and moved on. If something felt to stressful and I could change it, I did. I’m sure I wasn’t always right, but every one of us is human and we make mistakes
Perhaps I forgot that time marches on and we all reach an age where we don’t turn many heads and the companies aren’t so interested in hiring us. Perhaps many of us forget our ‘glory days’ are limited. Some of us thought our glory days were all about glory and forgot about laying a foundation for our golden years.

Of course our present economy doesn’t help the situation.

I could have been a person who was a year or two from retirement and lost my job without getting any retirement benefits. We all know that’s happening left and right these days. Or maybe, like my father, made it to retirement only to suffer a serious stroke.

So you see, there are always two sides. We all just do the best we can and none of us would be who we are today without who we were yesterday! Now don’t take me literally on the use of the word yesterday. I’m talking about all the yesterdays.

You are a perfect, beautiful gift to this world. Don’t let anyone ever convince you otherwise.

So don’t worry about how many licks it takes to get to the center of the tootsie pop. Just be glad you made it to the center and enjoy it.


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